Another week of being unable to mark myself safe from the final scene of Shrinking‘s newest episode.
Last week, the brilliant and devastating “I Will Be Grape” made me laugh, brought me to tears, then punched me in the gut and left me sobbing to Christina Perri’s “A Thousand Years.” And this week, Season 3, Episode 8, “Depression Diet” delivered another extremely emotional final scene — and song — that sparked a much-needed cathartic cry.
Shrinking Season 3, Episode 8 spoilers ahead.
As is true in every episode of the acclaimed Apple TV comedy, Shrinking‘s ensemble shines. Jimmy (Jason Segel) stresses over the thought of Alice (Lukita Maxwell) graduating, but finally goes on a first date with Sofi (Cobie Smulders). Liz (Christa Miller) takes a trip to Olive Garden and has a tough talk with Ava (Claudia Sulewski) about the three Bs: Brian (Michael Urie), the baby, and boundaries. And Derrick (Damon Wayans Jr.) asks Paul’s (Harrison Ford) permission to propose. But Gaby (Jessica Williams) is the true star of the show as she grieves the loss of her friend and client Maya (Sherry Cola), while questioning her entire career.
“Depression Diet” opens with Gaby awkwardly lurking behind a tree at the cemetery near Maya’s funeral as she tries to pay respects while giving Maya’s loved ones space. We learn Maya’s toxicology report tested positive for alcohol, Xanax, and Oxycontin. But as Gaby tells Liz, “We still don’t know if it’s an accident or not. We may never.”
When Liz hangs up the phone and Alice asks how Gaby is doing, she replies, “You know Gaby, she’s stronger than all of us.” And while it’s no secret that the hilarious, wise, incredibly capable therapist can shoulder a burden and weather a storm, losing Maya raises questions of self-doubt, regret, and purpose that Gaby never experienced after losing Tia. Those haunting what ifs inspire another round of powerful performances from Williams, who’s undoubtedly one of Season 3’s standout stars.
Early in the episode, Gaby meets with Jimmy and Paul to talk through her loss. Paul opens up about his time working at Bellevue and shares that whenever they lost someone on the job, his mentor would meet with them to emotionally process. He stresses the importance of community in times of turmoil and assures Gaby he wouldn’t have done anything differently with Maya. In true Shrinking fashion, before things get too sad, Jimmy cracks a joke about Paul’s neon green “slime shows” and tells Gaby she has “Dead Patient Face.” For a moment, it feels as if her pals/ fellow therapists can do some preemptive damage control to get ahead of an inevitable wave of grief. But in life, and in Shrinking, you can’t outrun it. It hits when it hits. And as the episode progresses, Gaby reluctantly readies herself for its arrival.
Paul tells Gaby that the way they honor the people they lose is to “get back on the horse,” but when she denies Derrick’s emotional comfort foods and offer to watch Lord of the Rangs, it’s clear she’s not ready to ride again. At the same time, she doesn’t ask for help. So Paul, being the GOAT that he is, shows up at her MMA group for Vets and reminds her to keep her guard up, even when she thinks she’s OK. And after Gaby’s patients/Maya’s friends, Mark (Keith Powell) and Donna (Jill Knox), say they’d feel more comfortable seeing another therapist, she’s most certainly not OK.
In the final scene of “Depression Diet,” Paul finds Gaby sitting alone in the dark. She’s in the office late, wondering how she failed to learn about Maya’s severe abandonment issues in their time together. She blames herself for not being able to save Maya and tells Paul that the worst part is not knowing if her death was on purpose or accidental. Her mentor reminds her that whatever their patients share in therapy up to them, adding, “Death is death. Try not to beat yourself up trying to figure out the semantics of it all.” When Paul tells Gaby that he thinks she already knows if Maya’s death was an accident, she breaks down sobbing in a heartbreaking show of emotion from Williams. GIVE HER AN EMMY, YOU COWARDS!
“I spent so much time moving into trauma work, I never even stopped to think if I should. And that was a big fucking mistake, because it turns out I suck at it,” Gaby says, cancelling her patients next week to take time off. In hopes of getting through to her, Paul shares a pertinent piece of advice from his Bellevue mentor: “The longer it takes for you to get back on the horse, the less likely it is that you will ever be able to get back on.” But to that, Gaby simply says, “Fuck the horse.”
She leaves Paul alone to utter a single “Woof.” And Shrinking leaves us alone to sob to “I Love You So Much” by the great Mae Martin, Canadian comedian/actor/writer/Brett Goldstein bestie and collaborator (IYKYK).
The soft, sincere emotion behind Martin’s vocals and soothing instrumentals lull viewers into the end credits and make the tears well. The song’s lyrics about longtime friendship, unspoken and unconditional support, and throwing a bomb into one’s life perfectly mirror that final scene between Paul and Gaby, who have become one of Shrinking‘s most lovable pairs.
Another win for Shrinking‘s stellar soundtrack. Another song on repeat. Another spectacular showcase for Williams’ incredible talents and range. Another round of tears from me. And another 33 minutes worth of reasons to say, “I love you so much, Shrinking.” 🥲
New episodes of Shrinking Season 3 premiere Wednesdays on Apple TV.