Many Americans have learned that when they see one of America’s finest in uniform or wearing a hat showing they served in the military, they could or should say “thank you for your service.” The gesture is small but noble when speaking to someone willing to give their all for their country.
Many veterans feel a sense of gratitude at the gesture, but Jeric Fry has a different perspective on it.
“Those words became dirty to me.”
To be clear, Sergeant Fry has no bitterness about his nine-year career as a United States Marine. He was proud of his service from the time he joined after high school until his final days when he was escorting fallen service members to their parents and recovering from knee surgery. The main reason his career ended was because he was going to be a father and wanted to be home, and even then, he spent three years teaching at the Infantry Officer Course in Quantico, Virginia.
“(That) was probably my proudest time in the Marine Corps.”
Unfortunately, the problem was after he transitioned out of service. Despite being a leader, teacher, and thriving throughout his military career, he couldn’t get a job. Management would ask about college degrees and not hire him when he explained why he didn’t have one.
“I would tell them, ‘I was in the Marine Corps for nine years and deployed four times. I didn’t have the opportunity to do that.’ And they’d be like, ‘Well, thank you for your service,’” Fry recalled. “It was like people patting themselves on their back, you know, saying like, ‘Oh, I told that guy thank you for his service,’ but meanwhile you were telling me I couldn’t have the job. So, pretty insulting, actually.”
Rock Bottom: Alcohol, Isolation, and Identity Loss
While losing confidence and people around him not understanding his struggle, Fry found solace by drinking. He found himself divorced, not very active in his child’s life, and by his own admission, drinking heavily.
“Back-to-back bad combo.”
Fry eventually found employment working with gas lines and plumbing, but he acknowledged that the timeline at that point in his life is blurry due to the heavy drinking. There was one day that he recalled very clearly that could be called his turning point. While pumping out a sewer on a cold February morning in Pennsylvania, he came to a revelation.
“It was just going through my head like, “Man, you’ve done a lot in your life, you have a bunch of capability, and you are smart, you’re intelligent, you’ve lived through a lot of stuff. This is not what you’re meant for.”
Fry later had a conversation with a co-worker, another Marine, and told him the same thing he told himself. He learned how to barber while he was in Quantico and decided that he would pursue a job cutting people’s hair.
“I went to this guy’s barber shop that I knew, and I took my tools, and I would just go there after work every day and sit there with my bag of tools and tell him ‘Dude, I can cut hair. Let me try.”
Jeric Fry Took a Chance and Changed Everything
Fry finally got his chance and made the most of it. He even went on to help the barber improve his shop. He said the skills he got from plumbing served him well at that time. Aside from finding a job he liked, he talked more with customers that were also veterans and first responders. While he was improving the way the tops of their heads looked, he found it also helped how he felt inside his own.
“It made me start to like open up and almost like, honestly, I was giving therapy to myself by trying to help others.”
One of his customers was a jiu-jitsu instructor that would try to encourage Fry to come to one of his classes. The idea of rolling around on mats didn’t appeal to him initially, but he finally conceded to give it a try. When he did, he was surprised by the ability of then blue belt (now black belt) and Air Force Seargeant Nate Hand, who Fry described as a “150-pound little dude.”
“The dude held me on my back,” Fry said. “I was 220 (pounds) and I was powerlifting at the time, I was pretty strong, and he held me on my back. I couldn’t move.”
Fry sat in his car questioning what happened that day. Many others in his position would’ve likely chosen to not go back because they never want to feel that again. Fry’s Marine mindset took over, and he decided he didn’t want anyone to be able to do that again. So, he committed, and it didn’t take long before he found a new passion.
“I was going twice a week and then I was going three times a week and then it became an obsession that I was going up to 10 times a week for like four years.”
Now, Fry himself is a black belt, and the changes he has felt since that first class have gone far beyond physical. He’s in a better place mentally, found a new wife, a new faith, and proudly said he is a better dad. The momentum just built up from there.
“I started taking care of my house, I like started making more money, and it was just like a crazy landslide of things that happened. Within a year I started my own barber shop.”
From Barber Shop to Brotherhood: Building a Mission Again
Fry recalled what it felt like to be alone and unable to do something productive after his military career ended. After discovering jiu-jitsu and feeling all the ways that it impacted his life, he decided he had to share it with others. He wanted to be a solution to the problems he faced.
“So, as soon as I figured it out, I was like, ‘I need to show veterans Jiu-Jitsu.’ That’s how it started.”
The simplest way that Fry found to help increase awareness was to host an event in the parking lot of his barbershop. Along with the matches and music, he also held a raffle where people who paid for entry could win prizes like guns and beer. He managed to raise $2,500 and decided to do it the following year. Every year he held his event, it grew significantly. After they eventually outgrew the parking lot, Fry realized he had something special, which led to the creation of Veteran Bushido Brotherhood, a nonprofit organization made to combat veteran isolation and improve mental health through fitness and community.
“The only thing that you’re required to do is you have to have an honorable discharge and have some initiative. The initiative is just reaching out; Reaching out, contacting us, and finding a gym.”
Fry revealed that he shares his phone number with every veteran that he supports, and they don’t have to do jiu-jitsu. They can train in any fitness discipline they choose, even yoga or CrossFit.
“I even joke around and say that I would do competitive dance, I just haven’t had anybody ask yet.”
Fry’s efforts have been beneficial to numerous veterans, which has spread to their families, friends, and communities as well. While he feels good about the difference he has made since launching the nonprofit, he admits that he may have benefited just as much, if not more, than the veterans he helps.
“What the Veteran Bushido Brotherhood did for me is it gave me the ability to serve again.”
To learn more about VBB or provide support, go to their website.